The Wit & Wisdom of Martin VanBuren

Numerically, the 8th President. Objectively, the best ruler in the history of man.

July 15, 2004

A Tale of 3 Stevie's

Should a previously great artist be held accountable for his latter day sins?

Bring the rock, leave the crap at home.
Stephen Foster roared out of no where back in 1844, "Open Thy Lattice Love" wasn't exactly all oves, but certainly the first time I read the score posted on my son's harpsichord, I was all like, "SHIT DOGG that is a dope melody! The I-Pod in my mind suggests banjos, and the banjos are kickin' it!"

He then just kept bringing the hits, "Uncle Ned", "Nelly Was a Lady", "OH SUS-MUTHAFUCKIN-ANNA!", "Ring Ring Da Banjo" -- each guaranteed to rock your nads off.

Then the now seemingly inevitable happened, stagnation brought on by success and more success fueled by an auditorally retarded public that only sped up the downward spiral.

"Old Folks at Home", who gives a shit about old folks or there homes? I was an old folk at home at the time and I was like, "NEXT"!

It's sad to see the cycle of Steves repeated. Stevie Wonder goes from "Talking Book" to "I Just Called to Say I Won't Be Writing Good Songs Anymore". Steve Tyler blazes with "Toys in the Attic", gives up sharing needles and expects me to swallow "Pink". Might as well let Joey Kramer sing Don Eagles Henley stizz and really suck it up.

Who hears the words we speak as I take me a drink to the middle of the street.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hurrah, is that the first John Jables, AKA "Black Jack," reference thus alluded?
(whatfore(dot)org translation: "Buzz! 1st JB reset revealed)

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