The Wit & Wisdom of Martin VanBuren

Numerically, the 8th President. Objectively, the best ruler in the history of man.

July 28, 2004

What Can I Say...

Loves Barak

What can I say about the Democratic National Convention that hasn't already put America to sleep by 8:45pm every night this week?



Not a whole hell of a lot--shit, Dan Rather ran out of shit to say on Monday, last night he was talking about how his wife wants to lick redi-whip off of Barak Obama and often refers to him as, "one sexy ass mulatto mofo".



This is my party, I love these guys and I fully support Candidate Kerry, but come on--it's a snooze-fest.


So far it's been like watching paint-dry or worse yet like watching a Republican Convention, but with more old black women with American Flag Hats in the place of pasty-faced, home-schooled, bible beaters from Retard, AL.



In my day the campaign didn't even start until much later in the year, we've known Kerry would be the candidate for months and so what? Yeah, more Americans know who the hell he is than candidates of the past, but the assumption that they care about what either guy is saying is way off.



Despite everyone's best efforts and hundreds of million's of dollars raised, no one will pay attention until after labor day and then the debates (if Bush dares show up) and most people still won't vote.



Not cool, not cool.



Bring the noise.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mr Pres, I must respectfully disagree about this year's Dem Nat conv. It's sorely needed, if only for the entertainment value it provides. Last night's Daily Show was the the best in months.

11:52 AM  
Blogger President Martin Van Buren said...

It also gives me the chance to imply Mrs. Rather has a whip-cream mullato fetish, but is that really worth the tens of millions in tax dollars it costs? Not when you already know the outcome.

2:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mr Pres, you asked a (rhetorical) question so I'll answer it: Yes, yes it's worth it 10 fold. I've paid millions more myself on weekend laugh binges.

2:49 PM  
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