The Wit & Wisdom of Martin VanBuren

Numerically, the 8th President. Objectively, the best ruler in the history of man.

October 12, 2004

Shut up whore

SHUT UP BITCH

I realize this isn't the PC thing to do these days but if Cathy were real I do believe I'd hit her in the face with a shovel. As the eleoquent American Statesman Daniel Webster used to say, "Nothing shuts a bitch up like a quick smack in the head with a shovel."


And Cathy is mos def a beeotch.


Bitches ain't nothing but hos and tricks

5 Comments:

Blogger Dashiell said...

Marty,

Sadly, since you've left office, dames have now gotten the vote, and even more shockingly, it is now illegal to hit them in the head with a shovel. We're not saying we don't want to, but it turns out our shirts don't get pressed properly when they have a closed-head wound. You know how it is.

1:50 PM  
Blogger H G Wells said...

Agreed, Marty, agreed!

You know, George Bernard Shaw once told me "The reasonable man adapts himself to the conditions that surround him " and then he kicked his maid in the crotch, quite directly!

I think these gents were making the same point you are here, "Cathy" has got to go!

2:43 PM  
Blogger President Martin Van Buren said...

I have no problem with women having the vote, it's bitches of any gender that raise my ire.

3:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If Mr. Webster had held on long enough to witness me laying the smack down on old Sen. Chuckie Sumner in fitty-six -- after he was running his mouth -- why, Webster would have learned a thing or two about the proper use of a cane upon bitches.

Emily Dickinson? Needs a whomping.

I got it out for Massachusetts broads, dawg. Where's Julia Ward Howe? You next.

-- Preston Brooks (D-SC)

1:08 AM  
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