The Wit & Wisdom of Martin VanBuren

Numerically, the 8th President. Objectively, the best ruler in the history of man.

December 01, 2004

And they wonder why we revolted

Prince of Wales, Duke of Soggy Biscuit AwardsHeir to the monarchy of Great Britian, Prince Charles gave a royal comendation to a British Ceral company yesterday.

The cereal in question, Weetabix, is a wheat biscuit that turns soggy when milk is added.

It's best-selling cereal in Britain.

The second best selling cereal?

Admiral Cocksinear's Toasted Gristle and Shat Rounds.

How bad does your country's food have to suck for soggy wheat biscuits to win royal awards?

Earl of NuttsacI remember a visit to London during the regin of William IV, I was meeting with some inbred Hanoverian twat of some aristocratic persuasion and he asked me over tea if, "I might like some Marmite?"

I simply returned the question with, "Would you like a kick to your tiny Marquis de Nutsack?"

It was at that point that his head exploded, in part because I willfully ignored the difference between French and English in his presence and two because he was a pea brained jack off.

Geezerz looking ordinary and a few looking leery
Chips fly round the sound of the latest chart entry


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